Plug and Play Parenthood

Photo by Marktristan via Flickr Creative Commons

Today, Russian President Vladimir Putin signed an anti-U.S. adoption decree into law.  Today, the possibility for a loving home slipped through thousands of tiny fingers.  Today, families already fully devoted to a child they will now never hold are mourning the loss of what wasn’t.

I’ve watched for a while as the wheels of this horrible measure gained momentum hoping that at the 11th hour, the Russian government would have a change of heart.  Though we went the domestic adoption route, I have a heart for families formed through international adoption.  I am a firm believer that EVERY child, regardless of race, nationality, or creed is equally deserving of a loving home.  Certainly children living in orphanages with notoriously deplorable conditions are among these. Continue Reading »

Tags: adoption ban, international adoption, Russia

Learning is here- photo by Cogdogblog via Flickr Creative Commons

Before our little guy came along and changed our sleeping and eating habits for what appears to be forever, I believed a lot of things that added to the stress of impending parenthood.  Over the course of the last year, I’ve learned more than how much Tylenol constitutes a safe dose by age
and weight. I’ve learned a few things the hard way that I feel are worth sharing.

1) Before our guy came along what seemed like everyone told us that as soon as we brought him home, our beloved Abby (known affectionately as “Durl” to those who know her) was going to be headed out the door. Continue Reading »

Tags: list, new moms, year in review

Happy Birthday, Sweet Boy!

A year ago today, you sailed into our lives, and you changed us for the better. You have been special from the moment you came to be, and I am grateful beyond words that our destinies are intertwined. You were meant for us, and I can only hope that as you grow older, you will feel that we were meant for you. I know you were born with a story instead of a blank slate, but I hope this doesn’t make you sad. You are loved beyond measure by two sets of parents, and I hope that one day, you will understand the full depth of all of our love.

Every night when I go to sleep, I believe that I can’t love you any more than I do at that moment. Every morning, when I wake up to your smiling face, I know I was was wrong once more. I love you even more than I loved you the night before. Our love for you is like the universe– infinite and expanding. Continue Reading »

Tags: first birthday, milestone

Every year, around this time, I start to experience an odd combination of both eagerness and a sense of nostalgia for autumn.  Bear in mind that I live in Texas.  There are, at best, maybe five days of ideal fall here.  It stays suffocatingly hot until October, mildly warm through November, crisp during December, and finally starts to feel cold in January and February.  Come March, and the heat slowly starts mounting.

Nevertheless, somewhere in my mind, fall is the smell of new crayons and acidic wet leaves, the color of fire, and the climate for shape masking sweaters, and  I wait each year, with bated breath, for fall to make its arrival. Continue Reading »

Tags: christmas, holidays, memories

Photo by Cea via Flickr Creative Commons

Happy November, everyone!  Halloween has come and gone, and now the count down to Thanksgiving is on!  Last year, Baby Boy tried to come into the world on Thanksgiving Day.  Thanks to modern medicine, he managed to wait until December.  This year, though, he will be joining in on the festivities and adding his own thread to the tapestry of our family’s holiday season.

When I reflect on my Thanksgiving memories, there are two distinct Thanksgiving formats that have monopolized the holidays of my years.  One set of grandparents and the gray skied, wet leafed magic of the day is bottled up in the memories of one format.  The second format is comprised of a laughing, beloved collection of aunts around the table showered in the golden light of an unintentionally antique overhead fixture. Continue Reading »

Tags: holidays, thanksgiving

Photo by Diekatrin via Flickr Creative Commons

I think that as a parent you earn all your legit parent cred the second your kid pukes on you.  I’m not talking spit up, either.  I’m talking full-on-gag-oh-my-God-the-smell (!) puke.

I am now a fully privileged club member.  There are no restrictions on my membership card!  Yay, I guess.

The first legitimate baby puke is somewhat terrifying, to be completely honest.  I am well versed in all other bodily fluids that leak out of a baby’s holes, but puke?  Not so much.  So, for clueless people out there like me, this is how it went down at Casa de Pollo.

Me: “Oooooh nooooo… that’s not a huccup…” Continue Reading »

Tags: joys of parenthood, sick

Baby Boy

Forgive me for being lost in a daydream lately.  The end of this month will mark a year– A WHOLE YEAR– since I received a  call from the agency informing me that a set of birth parents wanted to talk to us.  It felt so surreal, and looking back on it now, I relive the scenes with vivid detail in my mind’s eye.  It tugs at my core and stops my breath in a way that is completely unique.  That feeling is unlike any other feeling I’ve ever known.

I remember what I was doing when I got the call.  I was sitting at my desk just about to leave work.  In fact, on a notepad I always keep for work notes, you can still find the notes from my conversation with our caseworker.  I remember calling K and how my chest felt like it was about to explode.  I remember speaking with Baby Boy’s birth parents for the first time.  I remember the awkward quiet pauses, I remember working on finding common ground, and I remember how the floor and rug felt beneath my bare feet throughout the entire length of the conversation. Continue Reading »

Tags: birth parents, joy, relationships

Peaches!

I’ve been M.I.A. for a while now.  If you’ve wondered why– because I know that you sit around and think about little ole me– I can only supply one answer.  All of my excess energy has gone to making food for Baby Boy since he is practically Pac Manning his way through our grocery list.  This guy isn’t just peckish– he’s HON-gry.

I am concerned for his teenage years and my pocketbook.

That being said, I’ve come up with some really good, voluminous recipes for you food making moms out there.  If you have ever watched me cook a meal, you know that there’s a snowball’s chance in hell of me actually following a recipe to the letter.  I just… can’t. do. it.  I look at a recipe as a suggestion and always substitute, add, and leave out things if I believe it will improve the end result.

Well.

I do that with baby food recipes as well.  I’ve decided to share some of Baby Boy’s favorite pieced-together recipes.

Continue Reading »

Tags: baby food, recipes

Photo by Camdiluv via Flickr Creative Commons

“In three words, I can sum up everything I know about life:  it goes on.” — Robert Frost

I love this quote.  It applies to… well… pretty much any situation.  It offers straightforward, factual comfort.

Since I started this blog over two years ago, the adoptive parent/birth parent relationship has been a common topic among many of my posts.  It has always been a sort of enigma– a mystery that I could never pin down regardless of constant analyzation.  All that I know is what has already unfolded.  However, my busy mind tends to fill in the cracks with questions and assumptions.

The last time we heard anything from Baby Boy’s birth parents, he was two months old.  For reference, he is seven months old now.  We’ve sent monthly updates with photos, we’ve sent cards, and we’ve sent hand and foot prints.  I wasn’t sure if they received them or whether they asked the agency to hold on to them for a while as they tried to heal.  I just continued to send things, per our agreement, and hoped for the best. Continue Reading »

Tags: birth mom, birth parents, birthparents, open adoption, relationships, semi-open adoption

Photo by K

Last week, my husband and I spent our first night away from Baby Boy… for four nights…  in a different country.  Early Monday morning, I held it together while I watched the crack of light grow smaller as our garage door closed.  Feeling equal parts fretfulness and guilt, I only teared up a little.  Once we arrived at the air port, that dissolved among all the hustle and bustle.  For four glorious days, there was no feeding scheduling, no diaper washing, and no bottle washing, which I have officially deemed the worst baby related task.  Though I thoroughly expected to be heartbroken and homesick by the trip’s end, I found myself wishing for just one more day.   I missed him, sure, but one more day of not worrying about anything but sunscreen application sounded fantastic.

Then I felt a little guilty.  Okay… A LOT guilty. Continue Reading »

Tags: identity, parenthood, teething, vacation